On Tarzan & Company
Tarzan Spriggs, (real name), said he wore hand-me-downs, (clothes outgrown by older brothers & sisters),... to school.
He was three kids down from the only girl in the family.
He indicated that he received high marks for wearing the most colorful, knee length skirt, of anyone in the sixth grade.
One of his uncles was in the Space program,.... for a short time.
They sent him to the moon.....it was a half moon.....and he missed it.
He said it wasn't one of his favorite uncles, tho.
Cletus sent away for one of them fancy telephone answering machines.
He's awful proud of it.....thinks it's possibly the first one in his community.
His favorite feature is, being able to leave a message for any caller, stating when he left to go out of town, how long he will be gone, and when he will return.
Sounds reasonable to me.
Said he recently moved into a house with an abundance of privacy.
In fact it is totally surrounded by a high fence.
He alleges he could run around in the yard naked, if he wanted to.
He did have some concern that some of the neighbors still have ample eyesight that would enable them to see thru the chain link fence.
Said he had lately gotten turned on to Rap music.
His favorite artist is Puff Father.
Talbert showed up one morning with his left arm in a cast.
Said he broke his arm eating breakfast....he fell out of a persimmon tree.
He never had any money.
Complained that if you could go around the world on a guarter, he wouldn't make it to the first red light .
Said if Battleships were ten cents a dozen, the best he could do would be to stand on the dock and whisper......ain't that cheap.
Got a letter from Tarzan Spriggs yesterday.
He still thinks I'm crazy for not giving up that sangin bidness, & git back to the farm, where I belong.
Said they are quite proud of that little forty seb'm acres they picked up back in the fifties. Said they got it for a song.
He alleges if the Lord tarries, it will be theirs in just twelve short years.
Course, they have had to re-up the loan at the bank a few times, mostly when the price of guano would go out of sight.
Said they've prospered thru thick & thin. Probably won't ever git real wealthy,
but they ain't never had to want for nuthin.
Said day before yesterday, the ole Poland China sow, who's getting up in years, foun't leb'm pigs, all with the exact same spots as her.
Translation: ( Brood sow, of the Poland China breed, apparently getting old,
gave birth to eleven baby pigs who odly enough, had the same black & white spots as their mother. )
Said his Rhode Islunt' red settin' hen stole her nest down in the edge of the branch, laid an even dozen eggs, and all ten of them hatched out perfect.
Translation: ( Mother hen of the Rhode Island breed, made her nest in the edge of the woods, thinking she would be hidden from predators,( such as Tarzan ). All ten....or twelve,.... depending on where you studied math, survived the incubation.)
Thank you Tarzan.
On Gospel Singers
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